Saturday, October 30, 2004

Bin Laden Adopts Democrat Talking Points

In a remarkable geopolitical meeting of minds, the pre-election address of top global terrorist Osama bin Laden shows he has adopted many of the Democratic Party's talking points. Transcripts of the address released late Friday reveal such stunning similarities that it's obvious bin Laden has been following the U.S. presidential race very closely - and he agrees on issue after issue with domestic critics of the Bush administration.

• Dem Talking Point No. 1: BUSH STOLE THE 2000 ELECTION
In bin Laden's version, President George H. W. Bush began planning to steal the 2000 election years in advance: "He was bright in putting his sons as governors in states and he didn't forget to transfer his experience from rulers of our region to Florida to falsify elections to benefit from it in critical times."

• Dem Talking Point No. 2: BUSH MISLED AMERICA
In bin Laden's version, the terror kingpin warns that Bush is covering-up the "true reason" for the 9/11 attacks. "Although we are ushering the fourth year after 9/11, Bush is still exercising confusion and misleading you and not telling you the true reason. Therefore, the motivations are still there for what happened to be repeated."

• Dem Talking Point No. 3: BUSH WASTED TIME ON 9/11 READING TO CHILDREN Bin Laden distorts the 9/11 timeline to pretend that the Twin Towers weren't already under attack as Bush read a book to a Florida elementary school class: "We never knew that the commander-in-chief of the American armed forces would leave 50,000 of his people in the two towers to face those events by themselves when they were in the most urgent need of their leader. He was more interested in listening to the child's story about the goat rather than worry about what was happening to the towers. So, we had three times the time necessary to accomplish the events."

• Dem Talking Point No. 4: BUSH IS A FACIST
A favorite of radical Democrats, bin Laden compares the Bush administration to the authoritarian regimes in the Mideast. "What happened was that he was impressed by the monarchies and the military regimes, and he was jealous of them staying in power for tens of years, embezzling the public money without any accountability. And he moved the tyranny and suppression of freedom to his own country, and they called it the Patriot Act, under the disguise of fighting terrorism. And Bush, the father, found it good to install his children as governors and leaders."

Bin Laden complains that their relationship spans two generations: "The resemblance started when [former President George H.W.] Bush, the father, visited the area, when some of our own were impressed by America and were hoping that the visits would affect and influence our countries."

Here bin Laden adopts the position of the Cynthia McKinney wing of the Democratic Party, which blames the alliance between the U.S. and Israel for provoking the 9/11 attacks: "After the injustice was so much and we saw transgressions and the coalition between Americans and the Israelis against our people in Palestine and Lebanon, it occurred to my mind that we deal with the towers. And these special events that directly and personally affected me go back to 1982 and what happened when America gave permission for Israel to invade Lebanon. And assistance was given by the American sixth fleet."

from on story title for link...

Friday, October 29, 2004

An amusing little diversion...

Dangit. Blogger ate my post! Trying again...

A little game, for your amusement.

Click on the link. When you get to the screen to play....... click the sign he is holding titled "Start".

Move your mouse left to right (no clicking) to keep him walking in a straight line. The object of the game is to keep him walking in a straight line, without falling over. You can't see your mouse which makes it more difficult.

After 20 minutes of deep concentration, I hit 82. Does that mean I'm a good drunk or a BAD drunk? *snicker*

For those of you pretending to work, there's sound. Be careful. There's yodeling involved.

I guess this kinda goes hand in hand with the flu post, eh? hehehehe

Uhsphincter says Whaaaa?

Brokaw: Someone has analyzed the President’s military aptitude tests and yours, and concluded that he has a higher IQ than you do.

Kerry: That’s great. More power. I don’t know how they’ve done it, because my record is not public. So I don’t know where you’re getting that from.

-NBC Nightly News, October 28, 2004Golden Drawstring to PoliPundit

Republican Celebrities

My sweet husband sent me a link to a website that lists republican celebrities/personalities. Ala71, here's some more to add to your list! Click on the title above to visit the source.

Danny Aiello
Joan Allen
Scott Baio
Adam Baldwin
Stephen Baldwin
James Belushi
Tom Berenger
Eric Bruno Borgman
Ernest Borgnine
Bruce Boxleitner, though his wife, Melissa Gilbert, is a Democrat.
Lara Flynn Boyle, admits to being a "Democrat by blood," but says, "I'm 100 percent for Bush."
Wilford Brimley
Morgan Brittany
Delta Burke
Dean Cain
Kirk Cameron
Drew Carey
Nancy Cartwright
Dana Carvey
Emma Caulfield
James Caviezel
Mike Connors
Robert Conrad
Kevin Costner Voiced support for Democratic candidates in the primaries this year.
Tony Danza
Robert Davi
Doris Day
Bo Derek
Shannen Doherty
Jerry Doyle
Fred Dryer (also football player)
Robert Duvall
Leslie Easterbrook
Clint Eastwood
R. Lee Ermey
Chad Everett
Jamie Farr
Glenn Ford
Peter Ford
Jeff Foxworthy
Dennis Franz
John Gavin
Sarah Michelle Gellar
Mel Gibson
Kelsey Grammer
Fred Grandy, also a former congressman from Iowa
George Hamilton
Angie Harmon
Patricia Heaton
Charlton Heston
Jennifer Love Hewitt
Catherine Hicks
Hal Holbrook
Dennis Hopper Voted for Bush.
Jonathan Jackson
Dean Jones
James Earl Jones
Shirley Jones
Mike Judge
Yaphet Kotto
Cheryl Ladd
Heather Locklear
Norm MacDonald
John Malkovich
Jackie Mason, extremely anti-Hillary Clinton, sides with Sean Hannity on TV
Andrew McCarthy is also a columnist for National Review ! NOT the same Andrew McCarthy. Writer for NR is Andrew C McCarthy, and a terrorist prosecutor. However, the wiki National Review entry did list Andrew C McCarthy as Andrew McCarthy, linking it to the wiki biography of the actor.
Matthew McConaughey
Gerald McRaney
Dennis Miller
Larry Miller
Yvette Mimieux
Ricardo Montalban
Michael Moriarty
Jim Nabors
Jack Nance
Leslie Nielsen
Chuck Norris
Maureen O'Hara
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen (Olsen twins)
Fess Parker
Jason Priestley
Freddie Prinze, Jr.
Dennis Quaid
The Rock (Dwayne Johnson)
Mickey Rooney
Jane Russell
Adam Sandler
John Schneider
Rick Schroder
Dwight Schultz
Arnold Schwarzenegger, 38th Governor of California
Tracy Scoggins
Tom Selleck
Gary Sinise
Tony Sirico
Jaclyn Smith
Kevin Sorbo
Paul Sorvino
David Spade
Sylvester Stallone
Ben Stein
Jaclyn Smith
Shirley Temple
Dave Thomas
Fred Thompson, also a U.S. Senator from Tennessee 1995-2001
Tommy Tune
Janine Turner
Hunter Tylo
Jean-Claude Van Damme is said to be very conservative
Vince Vaughn
Jimmie Walker
Denzel Washington
Cindy Williams
Bruce Willis
Efrem Zimbalist Jr.

TV/Radio Personalities
Neal Boortz
Dick Clark
Rick Dees
Larry Elder
Sean Hannity
Elisabeth Hasselbeck
Kim Komando
Rush Limbaugh
Dr. Phil McGraw
Al Michaels
Lisa Kennedy Montgomery (a.k.a. "Kennedy")
Jim Nantz
Maury Povich
Michael Reagan
Pat Sajak
Pat Summerall
Hugh Hewitt
Laura Ingraham
Lars Larson
Michael Medved
Dennis Prager


Ernie Banks
Johnny Bench
Carlos Beltran
Craig Biggio
Ralph Branca
George Brett
Jim Bunning, also a Senator from Kentucky
Steve Carlton
Gary Carter
Roger Clemens
Adam Dunn
Dennis Eckersley
Bob Feller
Rollie Fingers
Carlton Fisk
Whitey Ford
Tom Glavine
Bo Jackson
Derek Jeter
Jeff Kent
Harmon Killebrew
Tommy Lasorda
Al Leiter
Don Mattingly
Mark McGwire
Dale Murphy
Mike Piazza
Cal Ripken, Jr.
Phil Rizzuto
Brooks Robinson
Alex Rodriguez
Nolan Ryan
Curt Schilling
Ozzie Smith
Bobby Thomson
Joe Torre (manager)
Bobby Valentine
Todd Walker
Dave Winfield

Greg Anthony
Charles Barkley
Rick Barry
Bob Cousy
John Havlicek
Magic Johnson
Bobby Knight (coach)
Karl Malone
Cheryl Miller
Digger Phelps (coach)
Rick Pitino (coach)
Pat Riley (coach)
David Robinson

Football (American)
Troy Aikman
Bill Belicheck (coach)
Jerome Bettis
Bobby Bowden (coach)
Dick Butkus
Harry Carson
Mike Ditka (also coach)
Fred Dryer (also actor)
John Elway
Brett Favre
Hayden Fry (coach)
Joe Gibbs (coach)
Frank Gifford
Franco Harris
Matt Hasselbeck
Lou Holtz (coach)
Bo Jackson
Deacon Jones
Jim Kelly
Jack Kemp, later became a House of Representatives member from New York state, unsuccessful candidate for Vice President of the United States in 1996 with presidential nominee Bob Dole.
Bernie Kosar
Steve Largent, also a former congressman from Oklahoma
Marv Levy (coach)
Peyton Manning
Dan Marino
Joe Montana
Anthony Munoz
Tom Osborne (coach)
Joe Paterno
Gale Sayers
Bo Schembechler (coach)
Jason Sehorn
Don Shula (coach)
Chris Spielman
Bart Starr
Roger Staubach
Lynn Swann
Joe Theismann
Dick Vermeil (coach)
Herschel Walker
Reggie White
Steve Young
Mike Shanahan (coach)
John Lynch

Ben Crenshaw
Phil Mickelson
Jack Nicklaus
Greg Norman
Arnold Palmer
Tiger Woods

Ice hockey
Mike Bossy
Wayne Gretzky
Mario Lemieux
Mark Messier

Michelle Akers
Carla Overbeck
Christie Pearce Rampone

Chris Evert
Pete Sampras

Dorothy Hamill (Olympic figure skating)
Jackie Joyner-Kersee (track and field)
Don King (boxing promoter)
Richard Petty (auto racing)
Daize Shayne (surfing)
Peter Ueberroth (baseball and Olympics executive)
Numerous NASCAR drivers (auto racing)
Kerri Strug (Olympic Gold Medalist)

Tom Clancy
Mary Higgins Clark
Catherine Coulter
Clive Cussler

Filmmakers and Entertainment Executives
Milos Forman
William Friedkin
Vincent Gallo
Mel Gibson
David Greenwalt
Merv Griffin
Ron Howard
Tim Minear
Sydney Pollack, donated money to Republican candidate John McCain
Robert Zemeckis

Musical Artists

Country and Western
Clint Black
Dixie Carter
Sara Evans
Crystal Gayle
Lee Greenwood
Merle Haggard
Naomi Judd
Lyle Lovett
Loretta Lynn
Barbara Mandrell
Martina McBride
Reba McEntire
Ricky Skaggs
Randy Travis
Travis Tritt
Hank Williams, Jr.
Lee Ann Womack
Mel Tillis
Brooks and Dunn
Montgomery Gentry
Daryl Whorley
Charlie Daniels
LeeAnn Rimes
Mark Chestnut
Toby Keith

Pop and Rock
Frankie Avalon
John Perry Barlow, former Grateful Dead lyricist and co-founder of the Electronic Frontier Foundation
Jeff "Skunk" Baxter
Pat Boone
Belinda Carlisle
Gary Cherone
Alice Cooper
Destiny's Child
Pat DiNizio, lead singer of The Smithereens
Dana Glover
Amy Grant
Michale Graves, former lead singer of The Misfits, writes for!
Sammy Hagar
MC Hammer (a.k.a. "Hammer")
James Hetfield, lead singer of Metallica
LL Cool J endorsed NY governor George Pataki
Chaka Khan
Kid Rock
Nick Lachey (98 Degrees)
Mike Love (The Beach Boys)
Johnny Mathis
Meat Loaf
Wayne Newton
Ted Nugent
Marie Osmond
John Popper, lead singer of Blues Traveler
Johnny Ramone, late guitarist for The Ramones
Jon Secada
Paul Stanley
Jessica Simpson
Michael W. Smith
Britney Spears
Frank Wyatt

Neil Cavuto (Donated money to the Bush campaign in 2000)
Anderson Cooper
Lou Dobbs
Diane Sawyer (Nixon administration staff member)
Bill O'Reilly (registered Republican as recently as mid-90s)

Van Cliburn, classical pianist
Yo-Yo Ma, classical cellist
Wynton Marsalis, jazz trumpeter
Ronan Tynan, tenor vocalist
Buzz Aldrin
Kim Alexis
Neil Armstrong
Debbie Brannigan, founder of the Capitalist Chicks ( website
Todd Brendan Fahey, founder of Friends of Liberty (, "the voice of the right"
Ericka Harold, former Miss America
Rachel Hunter
Kathy Ireland
Nicole Johnson, former Miss America
Audra Lynn, Playboy playmate
Heather Whitestone, former Miss America

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

How to avoid the flu

Eat right! Make sure you get your daily dose of fruits and veggies. Take your vitamins and bump up your vitamin C.

Get plenty of exercise because exercise helps build your immune system. Walk for at least hour a day, or go for a swim, take the stairs instead of the elevator, etc.

Wash your hands often. If you can't wash them, keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.

Get lots of fresh air. Open windows whenever possible.

Get plenty of rest. Try to eliminate as much stress from your life as you can.

OR ...

You can take the "doctors office" approach.

Think about it.

When you go for a shot, what do they do first? Clean your arm with alcohol.

Why? Because alcohol kills germs.

So...... walk to the liquor store (exercise),put lime in your Corona beer (fruit), celery in your Bloody Mary (veggies), drink out on the patio (fresh air), get drunk, tell jokes, and laugh(eliminate stress) and then pass out (rest).

The way I see it, if you keep your alcohol levels up flu germs can't get you!!!!

Time for some great Reagan quotes

No arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women." - Ronald Reagan

"Here's my strategy on the Cold War: We win, they lose." - Ronald Reagan

"The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

"The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they're ignorant: It's just that they know so much that isn't so." - Ronald Reagan

"Of the four wars in my lifetime, none came about because the U. S. was too strong." - Ronald Reagan

"I have wondered at times about what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the U. S. Congress." - Ronald Reagan

"The taxpayer: That's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination." - Ronald Reagan

"Government is like a baby: An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other."- Ronald Reagan

"If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under." - Ronald Reagan

"The nearest thing to eternal life we will ever see on this earth is a government program." - Ronald Reagan

"I've laid down the law, though, to everyone from now on about anything that happens: no matter what time it is, wake me, even if it's in the middle of a Cabinet meeting." - Ronald Reagan

"It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first." - Ronald Reagan

"Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it." - Ronald Reagan

"Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed, there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself, you can always write a book." - Ronald Reagan

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

IQ Expert -- Bush smarter than Kerry...

Since the early days of his first presidential campaign, Democratic hit men and women have challenged George W. Bush on his alleged poor intellect.

The generalization was that sure, Bush might be a folksy, down-home, warm guy but come on – when it comes to brains, he got left behind.

In fact, a phony claim from the non-existent "Lovenstein Institute" which circulated on the Internet in 2001 and was eventually included in leftist Gary Trudeau's "Doonesbury" comic strip pegged the president's I.Q. at 91, the lowest of any modern-day president.

Never mind that the young George W. Bush mastered both Yale and fighter planes, and managed to succeed in a number of business ventures, which included the successful purchase and sale of Major League Baseball's Texas Rangers.

Now, Bush bashers should get ready to wince, moan and groan: The New York Times reports Bush is not only a brainy guy, but may actually be smarter than the other Yale-educated presidential candidate John Kerry.

The Times quoted Steve Sailer, a columnist for immigration reform Web magazine, who is also adept at estimating a person's I.Q., and has done so for many presidents in the past.
In the 2000 presidential race, Sailer estimated Democrat Al Gore's I.Q. to be 10 points higher than Bush's score, which figured to be around the mid-120s.

Reports the Times: "Mr. Bush's score on the Air Force Officer Qualifying Test at age 22 again suggests that his I.Q was the mid-120's, putting Mr. Bush in about the 95th percentile of the population, according to Mr. Sailer. Mr. Kerry's I.Q. was about 120, in the 91st percentile, according to Mr. Sailer's extrapolation of his score at age 22 on the Navy Officer Qualification Test."

Sailer's analysis was called credible by Linda Gottfredson, an I.Q. expert at the University of Delaware. She told the Times she wasn't surprised at the results or that so many people had assumed that Mr. Kerry was smarter.

"People will often be misled into thinking someone is brighter if he says something complicated they can't understand," she said.

We won't hold our breath waiting for the president's detractors to apologize.

Story from, link available by clicking on above title...

Cats versus dogs...a current topic in my household

Scott and I are currently battling one of our cats and our dog over swallowing pills. My sweet little love muffin cat becomes a mighty beast if you try to get his medicine down. I died laughing when this landed in my email box...


1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right hand thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in hand.As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in right arm (To avoid wound on left arm) and repeat process.

3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in best arm, holding rear paws tightly with hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front, and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill; put down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side forgluing later.

8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow through straw.

9) Check label to make sure pill is not harmful to humans, drink one beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10) Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, leaving head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.

11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12) Call fire! departm ent to retrieve the ----cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13) Tie the little ------'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of steak filet. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water downthroat to wash pill down.

14) Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.


1) Wrap it in bacon

2) Drop on the floor.

Friday, October 22, 2004

Posers, Geese, and other random things...

The Great Goose Caper yesterday was just stupid. What a poser. Phoney baloney.

And where the hell is PETA???? Quiet as a lab mouse. Hrumph. If it had been Bush hunting, can’t you just hear the wailing and the beating of the breast??

Loved this Dubya quote – “"He can run - he can even run in camo - but he cannot hide."

And from Cheney – “I understand he bought a new camouflage jacket for the occasion, which did make me wonder how regularly he does go goose hunting. My personal opinion is his new camo jacket is an October disguise, an effort he's making to hide the fact that he votes against gun-owner rights at every turn."

Turns out he borrowed the gun AND the camo outfit from the farm’s owner. Ha.

There’s a great article called “It’s about terrorism John, not Testosterone” at

Opening paragraph –
“John Kerry is spending the campaign's homestretch looking for some conservative voters. He has been talking more about his faith, dusting off the shotgun and associating himself as much as possible with the Red Sox victory over the Yankees. Campaign spokesman Mike McCurry called it all part of an effort to introduce voters to Kerry as "a guy."

Loved this little tid bit too:
“Problem is, the strategy has never gotten much traction, and won't now for a simple reason: Those male voters are drawn not to Bush's cowboy boots but to his policies — his strong stance on terrorism and his tax policies. They tell pollsters so again and again. Kerry would have to decimate the world's duck population to compensate for what men fear are his wobbly knees on the world stage and his plan to raise taxes on the earnings they provide for their families.”
The Melting Candle just doesn’t get it. How can he? He lives in a bubble.

And why is he out doing all of the things “Manly Man” things Dems make fun of and harass President Bush doing at the ranch? Hmmmmmm……

And don’t we ALL need an entourage of reporters with us when we go hunting to prove we went? Why am I suddenly reminded of those ridiculous videos he shot of his heroic self in Vietnam. What a poser.
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Opening paragraph from a yahoo news article titled “Kerry Supports Anti-Terror Act, Shifting Stance” -
“As John Kerry barnstorms swing states in the election's final days, he has harsh words for President Bush on the Patriot Act: It doesn't go far enough. “
EXCUSE ME?!?!?!??!?!?!?! Is this not the Mother Ship of all flip flops?!?!?!? Next week he’ll be calling himself a republican!
Link to the article --

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I read a story about Bill O’Reilly’s ratings going through the roof.

Why are people always attracted to trainwrecks?
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I found this at Newsmax today. I find it pretty fascinating.. In response to a question from Harrisburg Patriot-News reporter Peter DeCoursey about fellow Bush critic Moore, Soros criticized the filmmaker for resorting to inaccuracies "to mislead the American people." Soros emphatically stated, "I am not a fan of Michael Moore."
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I was glad Trump fired Stacy last night. She talked too much and too fast…a walking, yapping headache.
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Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Back from my mini-break; Tuesdays; Redneck Jedis

Back from my mini-blog break. I am over my little hissy fit.

I’m very….uhm….sensitive…when it comes to gay issues because of all the friends I have and all the friends I have lost…

I lose my mind when someone goes after me about it.

Thank you all for the wonderful comments.

BigandMean, you were right, that meanie was a woman. She commented under anonymous but signed it “Patricia”…

Not so subtle subject change.
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Today is Tuesday and I am so excited. Every Tuesday night, Scott and I and “Scarlotta62” and her hubby meet up at the corner bar for steak night. For $11 you get whatever kind of steak you want (I like butterflied filets, Scott likes t-bones, S’s hubby likes new york strips, Scarlotta likes anything that is still mooing), plus a baked potato and a salad. We eat, drink, listen to loud live music, drink, play bad pool, and drink. I can’t even begin to tell you how much fun we have.

Do you guys have that one couple that you just “click” with? That’s S and her hubby and me and Scott. We laugh and laugh, and never run out of stories or silly things to say or do. Scott and I are just crazy about them. And don’t even get me started on how much we love their kids.
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Have you guys seen the video of the Shiny Silky Pony primping? It's a hoot.

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And before I dash off the the aforementioned party time, here's one last funny...

You might be a Redneck Jedi if...

You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light.

At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.

Wookies are offended by your B.O.

You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.

Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark'll be a hoot."

You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.

You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

You ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with redwood deck.

You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

If you hear . . . "Luke, I am your father . . . and your uncle."

Saturday, October 16, 2004

mad today

I had written a different post that was a dedication to my beloved friend Patrick who recently died. I may post that again some other time, but I decided I was too ticked off to talk about this and Patrick in the same post, or even on the same day.

I got in to a debate yesterday about whether you could be a republican, but disagree on some of the party line on issues. I have said many times that I differ from my party on gay marriage (fine with it) and on border control (think it should be hard core strict). This random person said some pretty crazy things to me. I know I shouldn't let it rattle me, but it did.

A blogger wanted to know why people were upset over the Mary Cheney comments. I gave him a few reasons, and mentioned that I was a pro-gay marriage republican. Here's the response that made me so angry.

Are You kidding, Miss Jen?? What type of logical sense do you make here??"I know several people who were pretty darn insulted, because it is thought that the Kerry camp was trying to turn off the far right, who are typically perceived as anti-gay, and get the far right or prejudiced undecided voters to vote for Kerry instead. "Oh goshums, they were pretty darn--how bout DAMN insulted, Ms. DID(damsel in distress). How was John Kerry trying to get Far right and or "prejudiced undecided voters" to vote for Kerry instead.. " with what he said? If they are prejudiced against gay individuals, well, they are PREJUDICED, and not going to vote for him any way!

How can "typically perceived as anti-gay," be applied to members of a political party that declared only hetero marriages legal and GOD given??? What walk about trick are you trying here? Bashing is bashing. It is not perceived as bashing, it is. Ask someone who has been bashed."

As a pro-gay marriage republican" --what a lie! How can you be part of a political party that is against gay marriage, and say that you are for it? Your vote says otherwise! Either that, or you really don't care that people who love and care for each other, and are committed to each other, can all have the same benefits, no matter what their DNA mix is..Or is that really not an issue for you? Are you keeping that hot little Reppy vote because you have stakes in the oil biz, and you think that the rest of us will swallow that illogical nonsense you wrote?

And yes, CHILDREN should be off limits. Ms. Cheney is not a child. And standing up for the truth, and for the rights of others, is not a wrong thing, ever. I do expect more of her. I would have told my Dad where I stand,(and did) and opposed him if necessary. He respected that. But then, I'm not invested in the oil industry. Or in staying a DID, in the year 2004.

What the hell is wrong with these venomous, close-minded people.

Friday, October 15, 2004

Movie quote game....

I found this post by BigandMean in my comments and I thought it was frikkin hilarious. Wanna play too?

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In a family with several members connected to the theater and acting, I'm by far the least knowledgeble about famous movie lines. Jen may be the champ. Some favorites from my thespianally challenged mind and their sources:

1. "Badges? We don't need no stinkin badges"!-------spoken by democratic union goons when asked for their identification badges while trying to disrupt the Republican National Convention.

2. "What we have here is a failure to communicate". A John Kerry flip flop spoken right after he mentioned how successful he had been at communicating.

3. "I don't know nothin bout berthin no babies". Official Planned Parenthood statement in response to questions about full term births.

4. "I feel pretty, oh so pretty.....". Madeleine Albright discussing propects for peace in the middle east with Yassar Arafat.

5. "Do you feel lucky punk? Well do you?" Spoken by General Tommy Franks to Uday and Kusay just before they departed for their arranged meetings in the after life with the guy who used to play The Virginan on TV (another failure to communicate).

6. "The one on the white horse was a magnificent looking fellow". Barney Franks, looking over this year's crop of Senate pages.


I have some to add:

"There can be only one." (Highlander) Kerry's advisors begging him to pick one position.....

"We can do that. We don't even have to have a reason." (Caddyshack) DNC making their plans to charge voter fraud and voter discrimination even where this is none.

"I'll swallow your soul!" (Army of Darkness) Hillary to

"Licensed to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man free to kill gophers at will." (another Caddyshack quote, just because I like it)

"I want rustlers, cutthroats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con-men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglars, horse thieves, bull-dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, sh**-kickers, and Methodists." (Blazing Saddles) DNC memo, trying to register more people to vote for the Melting Candle.

Ok, that was pretty damn politcally incorrect. I'm stopping there.

Got one to add?

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

briefly, on the debate...

The optimist, versus the pessimist. The optimist wins.

My glass is half full, thank you very much.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Condescending, pompous, arrogant ass. I can't wait for the "Knight in Whining Armor" (thanks cig!) to go back to just being a shitty senator.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Both sides will claim victory, because the dems will never admit defeat.


Tuesday, October 12, 2004

Brutal, but brilliant

I read an article by Mark Steyn today that really knocked me for a loop. It was pulled from a London newspaper called the Telegraph. It's a brutal, in-yer-face article about the beheadings. Parts of it were hard to read, but I think Steyn hits the nail on the head. If it ever happens to us (and it could happen to any of us -- these people have zero respect for human life) - as a commenter named Annalucia on the lucianne board said, "we should assume that we're going to die, make our peace with God, and make it as hard for our tormentors as possible. Don't beg. Don't cooperate. And be sure to wreck their video so they can't even pretend to be heroes for the camera."

Here's a few snippets. Go to to read the full post.

from THE QUALITY OF MERSEY by Mark Steyn

Today, for the first time in all my years with the Telegraph Group, I had a column pulled. The editor expressed concerns about certain passages and we were unable to reach agreement, so on this Tuesday something else will be in my space.

I’d written about Kenneth Bigley, seized with two American colleagues but unlike them not beheaded immediately. Instead, sensing that they could exploit potential differences within “the coalition of the willing”, for three weeks the Islamists played a cat-and-mouse game with Mr Bigley’s life, in which Fleet Street, the British public, governments in London and Dublin and Islamic lobby groups in the United Kingdom were far too willing to participate. As I always say, in this war the point is not whether you’re sad about the dead people, but what you’re prepared to do about it. What “Britain” – from Ken Bigley’s brother to the Foreign Secretary – did was make it more likely that other infidels will meet his fate.


Here’s the column the Telegraph declined to publish:
Whether or not it is, in the technical sense, a “joke”, I find myself, with the benefit of hindsight, in agreement with Billy Connolly’s now famous observation on Kenneth Bigley – “Aren’t you the same as me, don’t you wish they would just get on with it?”

Had his killers “just got on with it”, they would have decapitated Mr Bigley as swiftly as they did his two American confreres. But, sensing that there was political advantage to be gained in distinguishing the British subject from his fellow hostages, they didn’t get on with it, and the intervening weeks reflected poorly on both Britain and Mr Bigley.


For their pains, the government was informed by Paul Bigley that the Prime Minister had “blood on his hands”. This seems an especially stupid and contemptible formulation when anyone with an Internet connection can see Ken Bigley’s blood and the hand it’s literally on holding up his head.


By contrast with the Fleet Street-Scouser-Whitehall fiasco of the last three weeks, consider Fabrizio Quattrocchi, murdered in Iraq on April 14th. In the moment before his death, he yanked off his hood and cried defiantly, “I will show you how an Italian dies!” He ruined the movie for his killers. As a snuff video and recruitment tool, it was all but useless, so much so that the Arabic TV stations declined to show it.


None of the above would have guaranteed Mr Bigley’s life, but it would have given him, as it did Signor Quattrocchi, a less pitiful death, and it would have spared the world a glimpse of the feeble and unserious Britain of the last few weeks. The jihadists have become rather adept at devising tests customized for each group of infidels: Madrid got bombed, and the Spaniards failed their test three days later; the Australian Embassy in Jakarta got bombed, but the Aussies held firm and re-elected John Howard’s government anyway. With Britain, the Islamists will have drawn many useful lessons from the decadence and defeatism on display.


Go read the full article. Links above.

New Hurricane Advisory

The National Weather Service has issued a warning for yet another catastrophic hurricane following on the heels of Charley, Ivan and Jeanne. The path of this hurricane zigs and zags, and is therefore highly unpredictable. Experts predict that this one will cause the most damage to the United States that we have experienced in four years.

They are naming this one Hurricane Kerry.

Be advised, the only way for citizens to protect themselves is by being behind a Bush

hearing a rim shot in my

Monday, October 11, 2004

Random stuff on my mind today...

Afghanistan’s election – Did anyone else get choked up over watching the women waiting in line for hours to vote for the first time???

"I'm still celebrating. The Afghan people voted yesterday, in the millions . . . and nothing else matters to me," President Hamid Karzai said.
Australia’s election – Very happy about our ally, John Howard, winning his re- election bid.
''We have to get back to the place we were, where terrorists are not the focus of our lives, but they're a nuisance,'' Kerry told the New York Times Magazine on Sunday.

Aye carumba. This is one of the dumbest things he has ever said. We have to DESTROY them. END them. VAPORIZE them. Not let them hang around and be a “nuisance”. I can’t believe he said that.
Sad about Christopher Reeve dying. I loved him in Noises Off, Somewhere in Time, and the first Superman...
Spam spam spam spam spam. I am getting spammed to death on my email. There’s an article on drudge about the problem.

“Bulk unsolicited emails account for over 60 per cent of all email traffic on the internet, according to the Office of Fair Trading. That is up from under half in 2003 and under 10 per cent in 2001.
It is believed that over 80 per cent of spam received by UK internet users originates from overseas.
Baseball fever has taken over my husband’s brain….so in honor of Scott, “Go Yankees!”.
From -- "Ken Caminiti, a former Houston Astros third baseman and National League Most Valuable Player whose career came crashing down under the burden of drug and legal problems, died of a massive heart attack in New York late Sunday, his agent confirmed. He was 41."
Go see “Friday Night Lights”!!!!
I love Philly accents.
Michael wrote a poem for me. I love it!

There was a young maid'n
Who gave of her time
So it was from this
I sent out this rhyme
She has good humor
Flair mixed with style
But the one thing she does
Is make this ogre smile
So pen dear, write on
For you are the fuse
That sparked within me
A techie type muse
And rest easily, your vet by your side
W will win, let you vote be your guide

Is that cool or what??? Please check out his brand new blog at
The weather here is magnificent today. Cool breeze...lovely can't help but be happy on a day like this, despite the fact that it's a Monday!

I hope you are all feeling as happy and healthy as I am today.

Saturday, October 09, 2004

Another must read by Dick Morris



October 9, 2004 -- BUSH is back!

The president finally showed the guts, determination and focus that earned him victories in the three debates with Al Gore. He finally did his homework. He focused on his briefing points and mobilized his rhetoric to win the second debate.

It was Reagan-Mondale all over again. In the first debate of 1984, Walter Mondale soundly defeated Ronald Reagan, and in the process raised questions about the elderly president's metal acuity. In the first debate of 2004, Kerry's victory raised worries about President Bush's mental acuity. But in the second debate of his re-election year, Reagan rebounded through his humor to reassure the doubters. Twenty years later, Bush recovered through his aggressiveness to make clear that he is still the president, still the man.

Bush won even in the domestic-policy part of the debate — a victory that was as unlikely as John Kerry's win in last week's confrontation on foreign issues. By explaining his tax-cut policies and hanging John Edwards' trial-lawyer record around Kerry's neck, he rebutted the Democratic attacks and made his own record visible and showcased it compellingly.

But it was in the opening 38 minutes that focused on Iraq and the War on Terror that Bush won the key points. By coming out aggressively and attacking the bribery in the Oil-for-Food program, he showed the strength and vigor that Americans know is necessary to deal with the terrorist threat.

Bush won this debate by acing the issue of Iraq. He explained the rationale for the war and tied it to protecting homeland security. He defended his deficit by saying he was not willing either to raise taxes or to endanger our troops by underfunding the War on Terror.

The dignified, coiffeured John Kerry came out behind his podium and paced the floor. But he was shown up by George W. Bush. He showed how superficial were his arguments and how contradictory was his record. In a forum that seemed more real for the participation of the voters, Bush made it clear that he is in charge and that he is protecting us in a way that John Kerry never could do.

Kerry's debating gimmicks, his briefing notes, his talking points all came up against Bush's presidential-ness — and came up short. He was reduced to quibbling while the president focused on national policy and our public interest.

The essential contradiction of Kerry's position on Iraq became clear when Bush demonstrated how facile was the Democrat's hope that he could attract allies or win the war while proclaiming it a mistake, a failure, and a distraction.

And in the off-camera moments, it was Kerry's turn to look angry and for the bags under his eyes to acquire a petulance and a peevishness which had formerly marred Bush's performance.

Bush seemed ready to pounce. When Kerry spoke, it was Bush who crept up behind and rebutted the Democrat's talking points. Even on the question of abortion — where I agree with Kerry and disagree with Bush — the president did a good job of casting himself as a centrist and labeling Kerry as a leftist.

The crowd seemed to reinvigorate Bush. He spoke with a dignity lacking in the first debate and a presidential bearing that was not there last time.

By labeling Kerry as the most liberal member of the Senate, he pushed the Democrat into the corner and showed him to be outside the mainstream of American politics.

Bush took control of the debate. The president took over. Kerry was reduced to the posture of an outsider, a pretender, an advocate contrasted with the president.

Will the debate influence the election? Bush's responses and his policies won. He will emerge stronger for this debate. A tied race will likely revert to a Bush edge. Can Bush maintain it? Can he go through the final debate, on domestic policy, and keep his advantage?

He had a good workout in this debate. He learned how to handle Kerry not only on foreign issues, but on domestic issues as well. Bush is on his way.

Friday, October 08, 2004

Texas Chili Cook-off

For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is.

They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time the Rodeo comes to town. It takes up a major portion of the parking lot at the Astrodome/Reliant Park. These notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:

Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The Judge #3 called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted."

Here are the scorecards from the event:

Chili #1 (Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili)

Judge #1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.

Judge #2 -- Needs less tomato, but still has a hint of a kick to it.

Judge #3 -- (Frank) Holy s***, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the Flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

Chili #2 (Arthur's Afterburner Chili)

Judge #1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

Judge #2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.

Judge #3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

Chili #3 (Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili)

Judge #1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.

Judge #2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.

Judge #3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting s***-faced from all of the beer.

Chili #4 (Bubba's Black Magic)

Judge #1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.

Judge #2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.

Judge #3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-LB wench is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

Chili #5 (Linda's Legal Lip Remover)

Judge #1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

Judge #2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

Judge #3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks.

Chili #6 (Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety)

Judge #1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.

Judge #2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.

Judge #3-- I s*** myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that barmaid Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my a** with a snow cone.

Chili #7 (Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili)

Judge #1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.

Judge #2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.

Judge #3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like s*** to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. D*** it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

Chili #8 (Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili)

Judge #1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.

Judge #2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor dude, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?

Thursday, October 07, 2004

break from politics

Today my blog is a no politics zone. Gotta rest up for tomorrow. :)

An older lady was somewhat lonely and decided she needed a pet to keep her company. So off to the pet shop she went. She searched and searched. Nothing seemed to catch her interest, except this ugly frog. As she walked by the jar he was in, she looked and he winked at her.


The old lady figured--WHAT THE HECK, she hadn't found anything else.

She bought the frog and put him in the car.

Driving down the road the frog whispered to her "KISS ME AND YOU WONT BE SORRY."

So the old lady figured WHAT THE HECK, and kissed the frog.

IMMEDIATELY the frog turned into an absolutely gorgeous sexy young handsome prince.


COME ON GUESS......................



She's old.......NOT DEAD!!!!!

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Must read of the day, by Dick Morris


October 6, 2004 -- LAST night John Edwards went from seeming to be like JFK to emulating Dan Quayle in the space of 90 minutes. Confronted with Dick Cheney's obvious competence, incisive parries to his charges and devastating rebuttal of his phony statistics, Edwards looked like the proverbial deer in the headlights.

Normally, vice presidential debates are not significant. But this confrontation should serve President Bush well. With Edwards parroting Sen. John Kerry's line in last week's presidential debate, Cheney gave the answers Bush should have offered but failed to articulate.

If the first presidential debate was a contrast of Bush's substance and Kerry's style, the vice-presidential debate gave Cheney a chance to emphasize the president's positions and Kerry's contradictions without tripping over his own words.

Cheney looked like a man and Edwards looked like a boy.

On the attack, the North Carolina senator to this observer seemed, surprisingly, to be a shallow lightweight, almost transparent in his absence of heft and gravitas. Cheney looked like the authority, the wise one, the arbiter of facts and statistics.

If Edwards acted like a lawyer, Cheney acted like a judge. The Democrat proposed, but the vice president disposed. There was no doubt as to who was in charge.

The highlight of the debate came when Cheney said that he had presided over the Senate as vice president on almost every Tuesday and noted that the first time he met John Edwards was last night.

And when the vice president zeroed in on Edwards' poor Senate attendance record, the Democrat couldn't parry that he only missed the votes because he was running for president. Why? Because virtually all he has done in the Senate has been to run for president. Having served only 51/2 years in the Senate, Edwards has been seeking the presidency — and missing votes — for half of his tenure in office.

The Al Gore vice presidential candidacy of 1992 was the beginning of a process of choosing a VP who will provide a metaphor to help us grasp the essence of the presidential candidate. Whereas formerly one sought balance in the ticket by naming a person who was one's opposite, Bill Clinton chose Gore to emphasize the generational aspect of his candidacy and to stress its moderate mid-south roots.

Cheney is not a metaphor for Bush. He's older, wiser and more articulate. But Edwards served as a poor metaphor for Kerry. His lack of substance and glib inexperience made one wonder about John Kerry. Edwards' inability to go beyond his talking points — the same ones Kerry had already used — illustrated his limitations and, by inference, suggested that Kerry suffered from similar problems.

Even when the debate swung to domestic issues, Edwards found himself trying to climb out of questions on gay marriage and trial lawyers.

It was only when he could lapse into biographical stories and trial-lawyer hokum that Edwards showed himself to advantage. His canned stories and rehearsed closing statement stood in contrast to his plasticized rendition of his talking points for the balance of the debate.

Dick Cheney helped Bush get well from a poor performance. John Edwards made it look like the Democratic ticket was out classed and out gunned.

Monday, October 04, 2004

Political geekiness

I found this via google today. It's from a free republic thread.

Live Thread: Final Night: RNC Convention: Bush Speaks
Posted by Michael121 to AmericanMade1776 On News/Activism 09/02/2004 6:08:59 PM PDT · 1,236 of 4,866

Man oh Man aren't we just a bunch of GEEKS.......

Go here to see one even bigger GEEK then we are.

This girl is funny but needs serious help.


Hmmmmm. A freeper called me a bigger geek...I think I am flattered.



Conspiracy theories? Or are we just catching on to the game?

I’ve been all over the web reading message boards and blogs and such about last weeks debate. I assume you guys have seen the video where Kerry pulls something out of his jacket in violation of the debate rules. It’s obvious that he had something he shouldn’t have. One thing no one seems to know though…what are the consequences of this action? Someone said that he would lose his honor. Personally, I never thought Kerry had much honor left to lose. So what happens if he cheated? What SHOULD happen to him if he cheated?

There’s a lot of people that are speculating that Bush was outwardly frustrated because he saw Kerry pull the paper out and cheat.

I read a discussion about the annoying head nodding Kerry was doing while Bush spoke. After the note card video popped up, some began speculating that he may have been nodding to someone who was talking to him in his ear, feeding him points to make.

Others are saying Kerry had the questions ahead of time.

There was apparently a wink to Kerry by the moderator at the end of the debate.

So add this all together and what the heck is going on? Is any of this valid? Or are these just conspiracy theories run amuck.

I found this on a message board today.

Democratic Party - Rules

1. If you're not cheating you're not trying

2. There are no rules that cannot be broken by a democrat

3. There are no rules that can be broken by a republican

4. The media will ensure that all violations of said rules will be regarded as either a. An honest mistake, b. A joke that was misunderstood or c. A rightful disregard based on a republican attack that is racist, sexist, ageist, and homophobic

5. Remember number 1 at all times


Sunday, October 03, 2004

Something about this photo really makes me laugh... Posted by Hello

Friday, October 01, 2004

Coke in the water fountain

As I watched the debate last night, I was reminded of my first election. I was in elementary school. It was in 1980. I was ten. It was some sort of social studies type class. We had been talking about current events and focusing on the Reagan/Carter election. My teacher decided to do our own mini-election in class. I can’t remember what the kids “ran” for, but I remember very clearly the campaigning. They made signs and banners. One creative parent had buttons made. Election fever had spread.

The kid who eventually won was not the most popular kid in the class. He was the biggest bull-shitter. He stood before the class and said he would make recess 30 minutes longer, cancel math class, make summer longer and put coke in the water fountains. He won in a landslide. We were ten after all. We believed him.

But then, nothing changed. No recess extension. We still had to add, subtract, multiply, and whatever else. Our teacher assured us that summer was the same length. And there was still water in the water fountains.

I was pissed off. I HATED math, and I wanted all those other things.

This was my first real lesson in politics. You don’t promise stuff if you cannot back it up. That kid went from the King-of-the-castle to borderline social outcast. Which brings me to the debate of last night… Allow me to do an impression, and in a way pay homage to my former classmate who was all ideas and no substance.

When I am president -- dramatic pause, repeat -- When I am president -- another pause --I will do grand thing A and grand thing B and everyone everywhere will love Americans and everything will be perfect and I'll put coke in the waterfountains and we'll all be happy forever and ever. Don’t ask me how I'll do it, because it’s a secret, but it’s true because I said so in my big boy voice. THIS president -- dramatic pause, repeat -- THIS president doesn’t want to share his crayons and he won't let other people from other classrooms tell him what to do. THIS president -- dramatic pause, repeat --THIS president needs to be voted off the playground because I think he's a poopyhead so even though I really am a poopyhead, I am the lesser of two poopyheads. Wait. No. I mean, I'm not a poopyhead. When I said I was a poopyhead, I didn't mean I was a poopyhead. Unless you like poopyheads, and then I will be your head poopyhead. Oh wait, you hate poopyheads? But the poll said...uhm, never mind. I NEVER said I was a poopyhead. Oh, you have it on tape? Well, I simply mispoke.

End scene.

I heard lots of broad ideas from THIS senator, but no actual plan on how he expected to do any of that stuff. He's like that kid from school. All grand ideas, no real plan to implement. "I want it this way, so it must be so." Granted, THIS senator's presentation was good, but if you actually listened, there just wasn't much there.

I agreed with Dick Morris' take on it - "Bush won on substance - I think Kerry did better on style.". I'll take substance over window dressing any day of the week.

I seriously doubt any person's mind was changed last night.